Definitely didn’t cost a fiver…

Dresses donned and after a few swigs of Dutch courage, there was only one way to arrive in style, by public transport…awkward pause.

Footballer spotting at the Bluebird

Luckily the bus dropped us right outside our meeting place, the Chelsea landmark bar and restaurant Bluebird on the King’s Road.  Looks like there are some perks to public transport after all! In true Chelsea style we got the Bloody Marys in and waited for the main man to arrive.

Before we knew it we were ushered into a private area and the boozing began. Jamie was joined by Tade and Tosh Oyerinde and Patrick Molgaard, soon to be international party boys and the brains behind Gleepost uniRoulette, and two other competition winners.

Candy Kittens

After the sixth round we were firm friends and as the news came in that the website had reached 8,000 users, the brothers decided it was time to spend the equivalent of half a month’s student rent on Moet. Not complaining.

Enough drinks?

So we’d all had a few shandys and it was time to talk Made In Chelsea. In the words of Mr Laing himself: scripted reality it is not, IT’S ALL REAL.

Aside from the cameras of course, but just imagine how ridiculous your life could seem if producers were digging up your dirt, setting up awkward situations and catching that night you couldn’t remember on film. ”We’re all just pawns on a chess board,” said Jamie, in complete seriousness.

Pardy pardy Chelsea style

Here’s some gossip for fans of the show: Spencer Matthews and Lucy Watson are a real item. “Spennie’s not a bad guy he’s actually really cool”. Louise Thompson in the fall out from her relationship with Spencer is ‘a psycho’ and despite bagging Andy Jordan is already playing away.

New character alert – you saw him here first

This series seems set to be bitchier than ever before and it’s only a matter of time before the catfights begin. We can’t wait either.

Retweet, favourite, print screen

Telling us he should have been getting his beauty sleep for the following night’s BAFTAs (where he scooped a gong), Jamie disappeared home, leaving us without a celebrity chum. Fortunately, Chelsea ace Frank Lampard and his bird (Christine Bleakley) stepped in to fill the void.

Life of a baller

Despite our best efforts we were pissed and it was time to pardy pardy Raffles style. On a dance floor previously graced by HRH Wills and Kate and spitting distance from Frank and Christine we threw some final shapes, bought a £50 round and decided to call it a night. At least we managed to get home with a bit more style, we got a taxi.

You know it’s time to go home when you start posing like this…

So it turns out Mr McVitie is quite the boi but underneath the banter he’s got a big heart and a good business head on his shoulders, even if he is – like all of us – just a pawn on the chessboard.

If you fancy a revision break Gleepost uniRoulette is open every Tuesday and Thursday night from 8pm and who knows? Amongst the procrastinators, you might find the man himself. We did.

Crystal Fighters – You and I

A lot of hype about their forthcoming album Cave Rave – If this track is something to go by then we’re in for a treat.

Here is Ya Hey, a track off of Vampire Weekend’s most recent album “Modern Vampires of the City” released earlier this week. A fair bit of Champagne went down making this video…

Karmon has only been on the scene for one year, but with this remix of Fabo’s track Where I Stand, it is fair to say his future is bright.

Remarkable vocals to compliment this beautiful melody from London Grammar. Out June 16.

Still in the Library? This latest track from the young music prodigy Karma Kid is guaranteed to pull you through these miserable “summer” days.

Major talent coming from the Australian House producer, Isaac Tichauer. His EP, released under the French Express label, is available for free DL here.

The Great Gatsby movie is out this week and the Executive Producer Jigger Man has dropped his own gem on the soundtrack.

A bit of controversy over this cover of the late Amy Winehouse’s Back to Black – A lot of fans seem to be asking “What would Amy think!?” Would anyone not be flattered that two of the biggest names in music want to put their spin on your track?

The London based DJ’s new EP Not Your House/Audax is the first release under Real Nice Recordings. Nothing like some classic piano chords to get your evening started.

Tropics aka Cris Ward, has just released a summertime jam – Part of his Hope & Consonance EP.

Now, we have an answer. Architects are the biggest boffins around, spending almost 40 hours a week in lectures and private study.

Following the wannabe-Norman Fosters closely into the library are the vets, who typically study for 36 hours a week.

But who are the biggest slackers? Bumping along at the bottom of the table you’ll find business students.

They spend around 26 hours a week studying to become the next Alan Sugar.

Research by the Higher Education Policy Institute and Which? suggests the average student spends 30 hours per week on his or her degree.

That’s 25% less time than the Quality Assurance Agency (the squares who monitor standards in higher education) assumes a student will spend studying.

They reckon the average student devotes 1,200 hours a year to his or her degree. The report says it’s actually 900 hours.

The study found huge variations in the number of contact hours students can expect with tutors.

Nationally, medics have around 20 hours of tutorials and lectures a week. History students, on the other hand, are looking at just eight hours of contact time.

This might not come as much surprise, but there are also wild variations in contact hours per subject depending an what uni you go to.

A student studying maths can expect to receive anywhere between 13 and 22 hours of scheduled contact time depending on which university he or she attends.

We know we’re supposed to top up the contact hours with private study, but the average student spends just 17 hours a week working alone.

Architecture students spend around 25 hours per week studying privately, while business students take just 14 hours out of their weeks to do their homework.

The research suggests some students think they’re being short-changed.

A third of students said they might have chosen a different degree if they had known what they do now about their courses.

Whether you like it or not, you’re probably going to need a job at some point. You can only afford so many Jägerbombs on Universal Credit.

But what are you going to do? Fancy opening a bakery? Joining the circus? Want to live in a commune? What the fuck should I do with my life is here to help.

The site’s a simple one. If you can operate the left-click on your mouse, you’ve basically got it. Hit the button to find out what you should do with your life.

Click here to visit What the fuck should I do with my life?

Over the last two weeks stickers advertising pills for sale have appeared on toilets, tables and water coolers around the library.

The Tab has obscured the email address as this is a family newspaper.

They advertise an email address where students can buy the drug, which helps your concentration.

But librarians are waging a bitter turf war against the dealers, destroying the stickers in a bid to counter the influx of the drug.

The turf war gets violent

Naturally The Tab cannot recommend the use of modafinil, but if you’d like to know more…

This could be you

Founded in Cornwall, BBL has been held in South Wales for the last three years. But this summer will see it return to Newquay for the most ambitious festival yet.

Sun, sea and sand. Perfect.

The main stage may be on the gorgeous Fistral Beach, but this year the whole town is getting involved. There’ll be secret sets in greasy spoons, hidden rooftop raves and boat parties – not to mention beach discos and club nights.

And the fun isn’t limited to music

But if music’s not your thing, there’ll still be plenty for you to do. The BBL team will be setting up harbour-side cinemas, pool parties and laser shows, and they’ll be putting on plenty of theatre and comedy too.

Last year’s festival

Throw extreme sports, circus acts and pasty parties (yes, really) into the mix, and you’ve got yourself an unmissable festival.

Dizzee Rascal performing in South Wales last year

Voice of the people, Lucy Rose said, “Man I love the beach, and I love playing music. This festival is perfect for me.”

You heard the girl. Now post a smiley face below to enter our lucky prize draw.

Day tickets from £20. 20-24th July. Click here for more information.

Show rehersals – and welcome the cast

The cast were extremely well rehearsed & tackled the difficult script wonderfully. As there were no specific characters each scene brought a new dynamic to each actor’s interpretation, which made for a constantly evolving performance. The script was relevant to current events & pushed ideas of equality & creating a support network within a community.

Favourite moments:

● The car scene: a cheesy advertisement showcasing the ‘Annie’, a car for perfect people. This highlighted racism & a constant strive for perfection within our society. It also provided comic relief while driving its point home (no pun intended).

● The use of Michael Jackson’s ‘Smooth Criminal’ during one of the scene changes.

● Fiona Hoghton’s Spanish translation during an entire scene.

● The lighting during the scene where two of the cast members dismembered a body was effectively simple – one lamp place front stage right, creating shadows on the wings & ensuring a spooky atmosphere.

Standout performances came from:

Beatrice Lawrence, who gave an incredibly realistic performance when she took on specific characters, but also managed to snap in & out of them smoothly & easily.

Arthur Geldard, who showed off his talents by leading the cast in a musical number, playing the ukulele & singing.

Iggy Jeffery, who really should consider a career in sales! His comic performances were flawless & he has a real stage presence that makes him hard not to notice.

This was a truly enjoyable performance, full of political statements & upheld by a strong cast. Sometimes, due to the shape & size of the space, some lines were difficult to hear, but this was a miniscule issue. It’s a shame the audience was only about half full, but unfortunately we’re in the middle of the exam period. As only 10 scenes were portrayed, the performance was only an hour long & left me wanting more. A massive well done to all involved – it was brilliant!

Other brands are available

Forget Red Bull, Ritalin and Adderall, the Big Names in Chemistry are all talking about Modafinil: the non-addictive ‘wakefulness’ drug even the army are using. 

This isn’t like drinking a lot of caffeine, modafinil (there’s no street name yet) temporarily improves your memory and problem solving skills. Scientists are hailing it as a potential wonder drug, and there is already talk of Olympic-style drug tests for students.

Is it bad for your health? Does it present a moral problem? Who cares! We tried it and this is what it’s like.

Modafinil gives you tunnel vision. You can concentrate for hours on reading a book, taking meticulous notes, not looking up once. You don’t eat, you don’t really talk to people. In fact the only thing you will leave your work to do is poo, which modafinil makes you do almost hourly.

Normal procedure is this: Set your alarm clock for some ungodly hour, take two 100mg tablets and then go back to sleep. One hour later you wake with an urgent need to empty your bowels and what the drug’s manufacturers call “a sense of wakefulness.”

After that, hit the books. You might find your mood goes a little bit up and down, but generally you will feel akin to some kind of super-human, ploughing through work like a fully-functioning Stephen Hawking. After about 14 hours it wears off and you become a useless twat again, but you should be able to sleep fine.

• You can concentrate for hours and get lots of work done, and remember it all afterwards.
• It helps you wake up early.
• Quite subtle: this isn’t an overwhelming experience.

• Makes you unsociable and even, as your mum might say, ‘a bit snappy’ when people talk to you.
• You can become too focused and do things like miss your bus stop because you’re engrossed in a game of Angry Birds. Be careful when crossing the road too.
• Your mood tends to swing a little bit up and down while you’re on it.
• Lots of trips to the loo.

Warning: Modafinil decreases the effectiveness of the pill and other contraception, so take extra precautions.

Want to know more? Comment below and we’ll answer your questions.

Then expecting to take the exams and be like

Studying in final exam in third year

At first it’s all

Then…

Finally…

Leeds Met students complaining about exams

Art students complaining about exams

Revising the night before an exam

Asking a student what they learnt a week after exams end

Getting exam results in first year

Getting exam results in third year

A post on Leeds Uni Confessions told the story of a girl who used the app to secure a lift after a night in Halo. But the fruity student got more than she bargained for when she ended up jumping into bed with her fellow passenger.

There is every chance the incident looked something like this

JumpIn is a student-only app for booking and sharing taxis and meeting new people. It aims to save students money by introducing would-be passengers with the same destination to each other.

Founder, Sam Ryan said getting people laid was an an unexpected bonus for JumpIn.

He said: “We certainly didn’t think it would be used for anything like this! We’re providing a safe, cheap and sociable way for students to travel and if we do a bit of match-making a long the way, that’s just a bonus I guess.

“The response we’ve had in just a couple of weeks has been phenomenal. We’ve now got over 800 users and are turning over about 20 bookings a day. The more bookings that are made, the more share opportunities there are for students to save money.

“If the word continues to spread, we can all start saving money and who knows, stories like this may pop up again. Leeds is just the start of JumpIn, our plan is to be the only way students travel around cities in the UK in a couple of years.”